Tell me… have you set your New Year’s resolutions?
A new year is a great time to think about creating new habits or achieving new goals. However, creating what we want is often easier when we start by getting rid of what we don’t want. It frees up space and energy for the good stuff to come in.
I recently shared 6 Things to Ditch in 2019 with the Breakfast Television audience and would love to share them with you as well.
Watch the video interview or read the 6 things you can ditch to free up space for all that 2019 amazingness:
1 . Believing that value comes from what you do, not who you are
When we meet someone new, one of the first questions is often, “What do you do?” And we usually answer with a title… marketer, doctor, technician, homemaker…
But that’s not who you truly are.
Look beyond your title to who you are underneath. Our jobs do not represent who we are. Our jobs come and go. Who we are stays forever. Look beyond the title and see who you are underneath as an individual, as a human being. You need to love what you are doing,it can’t be forced. When you choose to do things that align with what fuels you, it brings out your light. My title can be Founder of CEO of Your Life, author, speaker, leadership coach… but what makes me, me is inspiring and guiding people to be the CEO of their life; to create the lives and organizations they truly want.
Your value is the core of what makes you, you. It comes from within. If you are strong within, you are Superman out there.
When you believe you only create value through what you do, without first understanding what you’re meant to do, you deprive yourself and the world of the amazing person you are.
Know your purpose. What gives you passion is your purpose. Follow the thread of joy. Trust the love in your heart, mind and spirit to guide you.
My challenge to you: Do some inner work and ask yourself who you are without a title?
2 . Looking for approval or acceptance outside yourself
Decide, once and for all, that you are enough. You are who you are and that really is ok. Accept your good and your not so good; your shadow and your light.
Oprah Winfrey says that every person she has ever interviewed, from Obama and Beyoncé to criminals and former inmates, has asked the same question: “How was that? Was that OK? How’d I do?”
Why? Oprah believes it’s because, “Everybody just wants to know that you heard me, you saw me, and that what I said mattered.”
It’s not wrong to check in and see how what you said or did was received, and if you can improve for next time. But don’t put all your weight on it. If what you put out there feels good to you, that’s what matters most.
Acceptance from others is nice, but fleeting. Self acceptance is enduring and powerful.
Connect with your inner voice. Partner with it. It’s the only voice you truly need to work with because when you feel at home with you, it’s easier to make grounded decisions that truly work for you.
3 . Striving for perfection
Failure and recovery are important to personal growth and development.
Celebrate mistakes. There is so much to learn from them! Celebrating mistakes strengthens your creativity and innovation. Failure opens new doors and, if you choose to see it as the stepping stone it truly is, motivates you to be braver in the future.
As Dale Carnegie says: “Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.”
4 . Judgement and blame
Be the hero of your story, not the victim of your story.
You create your world through the choices you make. Stop choosing blame, judgement or resentment. Know your impact and take responsibility.
Ask, “Where is victim hood showing up in my life?” Then choose to take responsibility for your reactions instead. Always ask what you can learn, how you want to show up, what you want to create. We are quick to point the finger, but what we really need is to take some of that blame for ourselves so that we can improve.
As Mother Teresa said, “If everyone would sweep their own doorstep, the whole world will be clean.” Be grateful for what is working and build from it. Focus on what you want to create and sweep your own doorstep.
5 . Beliefs that no longer serve you
Don’t let other people’s beliefs and fears become your own. Ask, “Is this mine? Where did this come from?” Identify beliefs that are truly yours and cut those that hold you in a story of powerlessness.
Gary Douglas, founder of Access Consciousness, says that about 98% of our thoughts are not really our own, but come from those around us. That’s ok if it’s working for you. But if it’s not, you’re allowed to let it go. It is safe to let it go.
Choose to consciously reprogram yourself. Accept your past to open up doors of change. You can’t change something you can’t accept. Take a truly honest look at your life. Are you living the life you want, or the one you think you’re supposed to have?
You know you’ve picked up patterns that don’t serve you (procrastination, worry, negative thoughts, self-sabotage, etc.). What’s the point of spending time with things that hold you back?
Claim authorship for your life! Every moment is an opportunity to write or rewrite your story in a way that is nourishing and life affirming.
6 . The illusion that you need to do or have a lot of things to be fulfilled
What will another vacation or shopping spree bring you? Maybe an initial rush, but it isn’t sustaining. When you try to create meaning by doing or having, you’ll keep coming back to empty.
Seek fulfillment from inside yourself first. Get clear on your values and inner purpose, then align your life with that. When you live in alignment with your core self, you will naturally find you want less.
Do things that feed your core self. Hobbies, activities, work, even who you spend time with… when you choose them from a place of knowing your true self, rather than trying to “find yourself” through things, you build on what matters to you and cultivate a life that is rich with learning and self-discovery. It’s a truer, more sustaining form of fulfillment.
“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” – Maya Angelou
BUILD ON WHAT MATTERS TO YOU.
Are you ready to ditch the things holding you back to make 2019 a year of joy? If you would like help clearing the clutter out of your life, or if you would like to help your organization or employees start 2019 with as many open doors as possible, contact me to discuss how we can make that happen.
Wishing you an energizing day!